Mindfulness Meditation

I've been attending a mindfulness meditation group for a couple of weeks. We meet once a week at 6:30 in the morning. The evening before the first meeting, I was up late and exhausted. I would not have gone had I not felt so much clamor in my mind that I was desperate to find a way to calm it. I admire the equanimity of the leader, and I hoped she could help me to feel some of that.

We do a long period of sitting meditation, then a period of walking meditation followed by a shorter period of sitting meditation, all in silence. At the end of the final meditation time, we have a reading and an opportunity for sharing.

The first week, I was very moved by the walking meditation. I felt so aware of the muscles moving in my feet and legs and core working to maintain balance as I moved very slowly. I felt gratitude for the many services my body does me without my awareness or appreciation. Getting up to walk across the room requires a multitude of systems to work together to do what I require.

Today I had a hard time quieting my mind during the seated meditation. I was able to consciously relax the tension in my shoulders and face, but it seemed like there was an interior mind muscle that was clenched and refused to release. I tried to empty my mind, but there was still a knot of intertwined worries, half-formed thoughts, irritations, etc. that I carry with me like a large ball of collected rubber bands, stretched tight and clinging to each other and to my soul. I wanted to feel peace, but peace bounced off of my collection of tightly bound disquiet.

Then the bell rang, and we stretched and stood to walk. I found my walking alternated between lifting a foot, balancing on the other while I moved the first forward, and finding my balance again as I shifted some weight to my forward foot. But in between steps, there was a period of solid connection to the ground, where I could feel toes, sole, and heel all firmly planted on the ground. I felt steady. I felt connected. Then I moved again, and again my body worked to maintain balance as my weight shifted, and I moved forward.

I realized this is similar to my mind. There are times when my mind moves from one state to another: worry, joy, irritation, fear, pride, shame, happiness, anxiety. Brain states come and sometimes linger, sometimes pass quickly. But in between, and I believe underneath, I can have a secure connection to myself. There is an inner strength, goodness, and wisdom that endures the passing brain states. When I peel away the bands that enwrap that secure center, I can feel peace, and connection to God, and love for myself and every living thing around me. Now I know what I am searching for, perhaps I can more easily find it.

New York City, Part II

I love the parks in New York. I will go out of my way to find them and sit awhile and watch people go by. We loved the park behind City Hall, with its fountain and gas lights. We loved Columbus Park, where aged Chinese musicians were singing and playing instruments from their home while young men played soccer in a fenced field surrounded by blocks of city buildings. In Washington Square park there was a farmer's market with potted herbs and tomatoes and fingerling potatoes on the other side of the park from the Occupy protesters and their drums. Every park seems to have its own personality and delightful little touches that set it apart. My two favorite parks (beside Bryant, which definitely rounds out the top three) were Central Park and High Line Park. Central Park is beautiful this time of year. The tulips and azaleas were in full bloom, and it is gorgeous. One of my favorite spots is Bethesda Fountain. On the south end of it is a passage which is beautifully columned and decorated, with mosaics I think, and has the kind of acoustics that attract singers and musicians. The Angel of the Waters tops the fountain. (This area is also the setting for the song "That's How You Know," from Enchanted).  It is a beautiful spot, with the boat lake (for full-size row boats) just beyond the terrace and the model boat pond to the East. 

So this is not the greatest shot of the zoo (no animals, for one thing), but it does show the beauty of the architecture.

The lake at the southern end of the Park, just north of the plaza. I love how 5th Ave is within a 2-minute walk, but this is so peaceful.

Some things haven't been updated much in the last 100 years. It was clean, though.

David asked me if I wanted to go out in a boat. I thought our feet were already getting sore, so he should have some part of his body he could move without pain the next day.

Stuart Little!

Bethesda Terrace. You can see the Boathouse beyond.

The staircase down to the terrace, though I prefer walking through the passage.

A better shot of the Angel of the Waters.

And rounding out the top three is High Line Park. This is a pretty recent park that was created when an elevated rail line was going to be torn down. It's actually run by a volunteer group who have done the creation of the plantings and design of the park and who keep it up, work in the gardens, clear snow in the winter, etc. What a great creation by a group of people who care enough to make it happen!

I wish I'd taken more pictures of this. There seemed to be a new and delightful element every few feet. One thing that was cool was how the path zigged and zagged a bit, so one moment the garden would be to your left, then suddenly to your right.

This was one of our favorite spots. There was a water feature that you can just barely see in the picture--to the right of the grassy plants, where the pavement is darker, there is an area where water is running across the deck before flowing into a grate. I watched a little girl with her shoes off splashing with delight. We rested on the wooden garden furniture, looking across the East River to Jersey. David bought us gelato (lemon for him and mixed berry for me), and we rested in the spring sunshine and enjoyed the day.

I didn't take as many pictures of food as I should have--what was I thinking? I loved the food carts, and I think it's tough to beat them for delicious food. But we also ate in Little Italy and China Town, ate pizza on the Upper West Side, nibbled on Gauffres and nuts from carts on the street, and generally were faced with more great choices that one stomach can handle in a lifetime.

So I took a picture of this at Whole Foods just because they are ramps (like baby leeks), and it's what Rapunzel's mother was craving.

We went out to dinner with David's boss and another guy on the first night, to an Italian place in Battery Park that was right on the water. This is the view of Jersey.

Red Velvet cupcake at Magnolia Bakery. Not nearly as yummy by myself.

There are lots of high-quality prepared food places, self-serve cafeteria style. This is roasted balsamic Brussels sprounts, roasted cauliflower, spinach and noodle pasta salad, and Greek salad. I walked down two block to Bryant Park to eat al fresco.

The Market Place in Grand Central Terminal. The food here was unbelievable. Meats, cheeses, bread, pastries, fruits and vegetables--you can grab whatever you want on the way to or from your train. Below are a couple of close-ups of the cases.

Pizza! The one with the blobs of ricotta is also whole wheat.

Part of David's dinner in Little Italy. Most of the time we'd finished before I thought of a picture.

The place we ate in Little Italy had an enclosed courtyard. Didn't I get a picture of my ravioli?

This came with the check. Like fortune cookies, but a whole lot better. As you can see.

Sidewalk dining in Little Italy.

 

And an Italian bakery. The shortbread cookies with whole almonds were fantastic.

The City Hall area has some of the most beautiful buildings in the city. The courthouse, the municipal building, etc. all sound mundane but they are beautiful. I wouldn't mind have a stake in the one below.

Farmer's Market. It's late, so these last ones may be a bit of a hodgepodge.

 Stock Exchange.

I love the intricate stone and metal work. Even on a fire escape.

Soccer field.

City Hall Park.

Municipal building. The one with the gold non-Moroni on top.

Lastly, a view from Dad's offices.

I enjoyed every minute, though my feet appreciated the break today. And I think I will always love New York City. Let me finish up with something from my family email today.

"One of the things that really struck me when I was observing an argument on the subway between a couple was that everyone on that packed train had a story. I looked around at their faces and thought of the struggles and concerns and joys that were all represented in that subway car. I thought about that as I was walking along the street, past crowds of people made up of individuals who are all loved children of God, and who all have worries and trials, and in whose lives He is as involved as they will allow. I had a great sense of His infinite love and a feeling of love for everyone around me. When you see so many people, and realize the Plan of Salvation is operating somehow in each of their lives, it creates a great appreciation for the Lord's infinite love and power."

Springtime in New York City

This last week I went with David to New York City on one of his business trips. We arrived Tuesday in time for lunch, and I had Tues, Wed, and Thurs to explore on my own, then David took off Fri so we explored together that day and Sat until 3 pm, when we left for the airport. The weather was absolutely perfect! Every day was a pleasant Spring day, and it was splendid walking weather. 

We checked into our hotel on Nassau and Maiden Lane, just off Wall Street and a few minutes' walk from David's office. Between the hotel and the his office is Zuccotti Park, famous for being the site of the Occupy Wall Street movement. It has a heavy police presence.

I didn't take pictures of the dozens of police officers standing around keeping an eye on things. But this is the place they are guarding.

 I ate breakfast here every morning--two eggs on a roll, which seems to be a standard option most places. Dad and I did eat at an Au Bon Pain the last day, but I had the same thing with avocado added.

The first day I went up to the New York Public Library and spent some time trying to find some family history information. Afterwards, I walked through Bryant Park, just behind the library (and in some ways, an  extension of it--as in the outdoor reading room). They also have a carousel, petanque areas, table tennis, and chess. It's a delightful park, and I spent time there almost every day. Pam recommended it to me, and I'm so glad she did, or I would have missed one of my favorite places.

The Library is beautiful, and at the outside entrance there are two lions, Patience and Fortitude, which guard the front. Inside, they are recreated in Legos. I also took some pictures of the amazing hallways, ceilings, stacks, etc inside.

On Wednesday I headed out early for Ellis Island. The boat goes to the Statue of Liberty Island, too, but I didn't get off there. I've been there before, and I wanted to spend the majority of my time at Ellis Island. This is where all immigrants were processed for a number of years (OK, not all--only steerage passengers. The wealthier passengers were vetted on the ship and allowed off directly). They came into a huge hall after walked up a high flight of stairs (the first medical exam, though they didn't know it). They went through several more quick checks, including having their eyelids raised with a button-hook to check for a contagious eye disease. After passing the medical check, and a few more questions, most were approved to take a ferry over to NYC, or to get train tickets to travel elsewhere.

The original fort in Battery Park. This is where you buy tickets for the ferry.

 The view headed toward Ellis Island.

Statue of Liberty. You can get the scale by looking at the little people at the bottom of the picture.

Looking back at the financial district. In the picture below, you can see the new building on the World Trade Center site (the largest one).

This is the building everyone checked into when they arrived at Ellis Island, and the only one currently restored.

The large hall upstairs where they waited.

The hospital across the ferry inlet. Doctors in training clamored to be trained here, because they could see diseases from all over the world. At one point, this offered the best medical care in America.

And I think I'll stop here so I can be on time for lunch. Part Two will come later.